Last night I saw Sheryl Crow at Avery Fisher Hall in NYC. She sounded good -- classic Sheryl. Her new album, Wildflower, isn't as rockin' as her older stuff -- it's more laid-back, mellow, chilled-out tunes. The audience reflected the maturity of the album. It was definitely a 30-and-up set. There were a lot of families, which was interesting. Linda Wells, the editor-in-chief of Allure, sat right near me with her husband and her two sons. (My sister commented that both boys could use a haircut, but I liked their shaggy 'dos.) Another celeb sighting: comedian Gilbert Godfried, who sat directly behind me. He was wearing earplugs at a Sheryl Crow concert. I don't know exactly what he was expecting, but I guarantee that earplugs weren't necessary. Besides, with all the screaming he does during his stand-up you'd think he'd have trouble hearing in the first place.

At 43, Sheryl looks good, sounds good and is just radiating happiness. But she made me a little uneasy. Why? Because I'm a cynical celebrity writer. So when I hear a star go on -- and on -- about her amazing celebrity boyfriend, a red flag goes up and I wanna yell: "Shhhh! Keep it to yourself. You're gonna jinx it." If Sheryl mentioned my husband Lance Armstrong once during the show, she mentioned him six times. She talked about how she spent the last few years going to his bike races. She jokingly referred to the white dress she was wearing as her wedding dress. She mentioned how she's been spending a lot of time with his kids. She talked about how he's an "actor" now. (One hosting gig on Saturday Night Live does not an actor make.) The Tour de France winner even came onstage to bring Sheryl her guitar.

Too much! Too much! Too much!

I give Gwyneth Paltrow a lot of crap because she refuses to walk the red carpet with hubby Chris Martin. But she's actually smart. Now, any little nugget she does share about her marriage makes headlines. And if they split, she really hasn't revealed anything and there aren't a billion pictures of them sucking face on the press line. She learned from bitter bust-ups with Brad and Ben. And you'd think that Lance would know better. After all, he's the one who gushed about his first wife, Kristin: "If you ever hope to meet someone and fall in love, it should happen just as it did for us -- blissfully, perfectly."

Or not.

It's hard for celebrities to find the right balance when it comes to talking about their relationships. But as much as I want to know every dirty detail of their lives and their loves, I think it's smarter when they keep clammed up. Make us wonder. Make us speculate. Make us pore over every minute detail that is revealed.

There's nothing wrong with a little mystery.

I was thisclose to flying to Las Vegas last Sunday to go to stud muffin Wilmer Valderrama's Halloween party. But it was the last minute and the cheapest flight was over $400. If it was Jakob Dylan or Bono or friggin' Snoop Dogg, I most definitely would have dropped the cash. Wilmer? He's more in the $200 to $300 range. Anyway, my friend, who did attend -- she knows him -- promises to spill some dirt. But we'll have to wait another day because she seemed a tad hungover earlier when I heard from her.

Anyway, instead of going to Wilmer's bash, I attended a family birthday party on Sunday at a quiet restaurant north of NYC. Small place. Out of the way. No big fuss. Well, when I walked into the joint, who did I come face to face with but one of the soap stars from my infamous Scores strip club outing. There he was sitting at the table right next to mine with his soap star wife, their kids and another couple. It was priceless. Needless to say, we didn't have a whole big happy Scores reunion. Can you imagine: Honey, this is one of the girls who came to Scores with me one night. Me and a few guys in the cast were liquored up and getting some lap dances. Good time. It was more of a look that said: Please don't come over here and say hi. I'm beggin' ya.

Of course I didn't say anything -- I'm waaay too smart for that. But my father, of all people, almost spilled the beans. I immediately told my sisters what was up, and then my eldest sister decided to tell my dad the story. (Because a father always enjoys hearing about how his youngest daughter went to a strip club with a bunch of married actors.) Anyway, my dad isn't so subtle. So he was asking -- from the other side of the table -- which guy we were talking about. ("Who's the guy from the strip club?") Luckily, he responded well to my "cut it" signal.

Moral of my story? It's a small, small world -- so be careful who you go to strip clubs with.

Got a thing for wacky director Vincent Gallo? You know, the one who made that porn flick with ex-girlfriend Chloe Sevigny and called it a movie? Well, now you can have his creepy little spawn if you so desire. Vincent's sperm is for sale on eBay at a starting bid of $1 million. The seller, who claims to speak for Vincent, is looking for a blonde, Jewish woman to have his kid, because "this connection to the Jewish faith would guarantee his offspring a better chance at good reviews and maybe even a prize at the Sundance Film Festival or an Oscar." It also promises that Vincent is "drug, alcohol and disease free."

If you're interested in the sperm, I'd suggest that you get proof of the whole "disease free" thing. (Have you seen the guy?) And while you're visiting the doctor, you should probably get your own head examined as well.

Which star is hiding underneath this Batman mask? I'll give you a hint: He likes to pinch the rears of New York City women. (And that's just one of his vices!) Find out Batman's identity -- and check out other celebs in festive getups -- by playing Celebrity Matchmaker: Star Halloween Costumes.

Mirror, mirror on the wall, did Johnny Depp just give Kate Moss the stupidest gift of all?

According to reports, cocaine-lovin' Kate, who got out of rehab this week, just received a special gift from her ex-boyfriend Johnny Depp: a mirror!

Is he crazy? Does he want the looking glass to have a starring role in her next coke video?

Not Johnny. Apparently the gift is meant for Kate to "face herself without fear." Mirror therapy is an old Indian belief that Johnny, who is part Cherokee, studied.

Aah -- how thoughtful. Now I love him even more.

Just when I thought I couldn't get more grossed out by sleazy Paris Hilton, I find this article about how she had sex with Mary-Kate Olsen's former boyfriend Stavros Niarchos in a porta-potty.
According to the story, the new couple spent the evening "kissing and groping" at a Hollywood party, then went into one of the stinky portable pots to have sex.

Couldn't the heiress spring for a hotel room? I'm sure she still has some pull at the Hilton.

And as for those claims she didn't know Tom Sizemore? You know -- the overweight, unattractive drug addict who has a prosthetic penis and beats women. Well, here's a photo of them -- together -- at his house!

What do you say now, Paris?

That girl needs to be hosed down. Disinfected. Her doctor needs to just tie her down and administer the biggest dose of antibiotics ever.

Dirty, dirty girl.

Tom Cruise is going to be thrilled: Brooke Shields is pregnant.

The actress, who is currently starring in Chicago on Broadway, and writer hubby Chris Henchy will be having their second child in the spring. They already have an adorable two-year-old daughter named Rowan.

Brooke was famously ridiculed by Tom Cruise last spring when she revealed in her book, Down Came the Rain, that she suffered from postpartum depression after Rowan's birth and used antidepressants to help her get better. Tom went off on her on Oprah and the Today show, blasting: "She doesn't understand the history of psychiatry" and taking jabs at her career. Brooke fired back with an op-ed piece in the New York Times (an article Tom probably missed because I doubt he reads anything other than Scientology books), saying, "Comments like those made by Tom Cruise are a disservice to mothers everywhere. The drugs, along with weekly therapy sessions, are what saved me."

So while Katie Holmes suffers through a painful, silent birth next spring, I hope Tom totally thinks of his nemesis. Because Brooke will be having her baby around the same time, but she'll be loaded up on drugs and feeling no pain.

Check out our Celebrity Baby Tracker for the scoop on the Hollywood baby boom:

Did you see The Apprentice last night? Donald Trump wasn't lying when he said it was going to be the best boardroom ever. Stupidly, I watched it really late last night (TiVo, baby!), so when everything went down -- and I was freaking out -- it was too late to call anyone to dish on it.

I'm not going to give anything away in case you didn't see it. I was so annoyed last week when I found out Kristi was gone before I had a chance to watch it. So if you want to know what happened, you can read all about it here. And talk about the show on our Apprentice discussion board here.

Kate "Hoover Vac" Moss is free at last!

A spokesperson for the skinny supermodel confirmed that the 31-year-old left the Meadows Clinic in Arizona earlier this week and was doing lines spending time with friends in America before she heads back to London, where she'll be reunited with her daughter, Lila.

"Kate is in excellent spirits and looking forward to getting back to her stash work. She would like to thank everyone for their messages of support as they have played a major part in helping her."

Is it wrong that I totally feel like it's Christmas morning? I'm so excited that Kate has been sprung. Will she go back to Pete? Will she lose her kid to the ex? Will she continue to snort Special K like nobody's business? Let "Kate watch" begin...

Apparently this motherhood thing agrees with Angelina Jolie.

At the first annual Worldwide Orphans Foundation benefit on Monday, Angie -- mother of Maddox, four, and Zahara, nine months -- told reporters that she's planning on adopting more kids.

"Most of the night I just thought about how quickly I want to adopt again," she said. "It's a very special thing. There's something about making a choice, waking up and traveling somewhere and finding your family."

Which country will she adopt from next? "There are so many wonderful places. There are many parts of Asia, Africa, South America, so sooner or later I'll end up everywhere, I'm sure."

The actress says that the fact that her children are adopted is no secret in her household. "We've always addressed it," she said. "I say [to Maddox], 'You're from Asia, you're from Cambodia. Asia is not Mommy's continent, it's your continent.' He jokes about how his continent is bigger... He knows where Zahara came from. It's pretty amazing."

Angie attended the event with her brother, James Haven. (Yup -- the one she made out with the year she won the Oscar.) Boyfriend Brad was in Canada finishing up his next flick.

Maybe it's the hormones -- or maybe she's just being honest. Either way, Britney reportedly told Kevin, in no uncertain terms, that he has to make better music if he wants to be a star.

Apparently K-Fed recently brought home some tracks he'd recorded and played them for the pop tart. How did Brit react? She laughed. "She said his debut CD might sell 'a hundred, maybe a thousand' copies if he was lucky," an "insider" told In Touch.

Her criticism is especially harsh because the new parents are reportedly going through a rocky period. According to the mag, she's getting sick of his behavior. One recent example: While Brit was busy tending to baby Sean Preston, K-Fed spent two hours getting his hair braided. And about a week ago he was seen at a Hollywood club late into the night after a nasty blowup with his wife.

Britney seems to be getting the Shar Jackson treatment, which can't be a good sign.

Try the Britney Spears Pop Quiz.

Somebody's gonna be in trouble with the missus.

Al Reynolds, the tortured husband of The View's resident big mouth, Star Jones, was tossed in the can at 3am Wednesday morning in NYC for driving with a suspended license. The NYPD pulled over the former Wall Street trader for changing lanes without signaling. Al ended up in police custody for 12 hours because the precinct's fingerprint machine wasn't working properly.

Lucky for the cops, Star didn't make an appearance at police headquarters, though Al did call his wife. (That's one call I wouldn't want to make.) When Al was released, he nodded to reporters who asked if he was okay. "Yes, thank you," he replied.

"Al Reynolds was detained last night and issued a desk appearance ticket for a driving-license suspension due to incorrect DMV paperwork," said publicist Brad Zeifman.

Lucky for Al, his wife is a lawyer. She'll get the case tossed. Unlucky for Al, his wife is a nutcase. She's probably go crazy on him for embarrassing her.

Wisteria Lane vixen Nicollette Sheridan and her fiance, freeloader actor Nicklas Soderblom, have split, according to People.com.

"Nicollette Sheridan and Nicklas Soderblom have parted ways after a year and a half," said Nic's spokeswoman in a statement. "They ask that you respect their privacy at this time."

The couple became engaged last December, while they were vacationing in Aspen. Since then, they have been fixtures on the red carpet. They were together as recently as October 15, when Nicollette hosted a charity auction in Los Angeles. There, she denied rumors of a split, saying "They should get the facts right before they print things."

Nicollette was previously married to Harry Hamlin in the early 1990s.

Since I'm already getting "why did they split" questions, I thought maybe we could all try to come up with some good reasons for their demise. Here are my guesses, then you share your thoughts ‑- or tell me that mine suck ‑- in the comments box below.

1. They were together just two weeks ago and denying rumors of trouble in paradise. Whenever anyone splits quickly, I immediately thing of one thing: cheating. That's the quickest way to get kicked to the curb.

2. One rumor floating around is that one of the housewives' significant others had a thing for women and men. Could the man in question be Nick? Maybe she found out he was playing both ways and dropped him.

3. Another rumor is that Nic has reunited with her ex, Simon Main, who is a convicted drug dealer (natch!). Nic was seen in Australia earlier this month having dinner with the dude. Nick was supposed to be joining her Down Under, but he cancelled his trip because he had to "work." Um, that can't be true because Nick's profession is currently "professional arm candy for Nicollette Sheridan."

4. Maybe Nick realized Nic is really a man.

For the week of October 17-23, the top 10 shows, their networks and viewers:
1. CSI: Crime Scene Investigation, CBS, 28.5 million
2. Desperate Housewives, ABC, 25.2 million
3. Lost, ABC, 21.4 million
4. Without a Trace, CBS, 19.8 million
5. Grey's Anatomy, ABC, 18 million
6. CSI: Miami, CBS, 17.9 million
7. Survivor: Guatemala, CBS, 17.8 million
8. NCIS, CBS, 17.7 million
9. World Series Game 2, Fox, 17.2 million
10. Commander in Chief, ABC, 16.3 million

Highlights: Most shows lost viewers this week. Grey's Anatomy moved from number six to number five, beating out CSI: Miami. Extreme Makeover: Home Edition was bumped from the top 10 because of the World Series.

You better cancel that gift order from BabyGap.

Janet Jackson is denying allegations that she had a secret daughter with her first husband, James DeBarge, and that the girl is being raised by Janet's eldest sister, Rebbie Jackson. In a brief statement to Access Hollywood earlier today, Janet said: "I do not have a child, and all allegations saying so are false."

So far nobody has been able to track down Rebbie or James for a comment.

That's gossip for you! Sometimes lines get crossed while the story is being transmitted. It was probably LaToya who had the baby with DeBarge.

Related:

I love that people are so fired up about Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes. Right here, right now on Blabber, people are duking it out. (See exhibits A, B and C.)

I gotta say, the comments people make to my posts are so entertaining. In one corner, there's the group that thinks Tom is a freak and that this quickie love affair is a big, fat sham. In the other corner, there are the people who think that what Tom and Katie have is true love. And everyone is fighting about it. I'm talking name calling, criticizing people if their posts contain improper grammar and even cussing -- all over Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes. It's awesome.

Like them or not, people take TomKat's relationship very seriously. Here's another example: My coworker Jenn was in Duane Reade the other day during her lunch break, talking to her pal about Tom and Katie. FYI: She's anti-TomKat. Well, her conversation was overheard by a pro-TomKat patron, who picked a fight with her -- in line at the drugstore. He accused Jenn -- a married mother of one -- of being "jealous of Tom and Katie's love." And I believe some nasty words were tossed around until he sauntered off -- presumably to continue his life's work, defending Tom and Katie's honor. I mean, seriously.

As someone who doesn't buy into "Tom and Katie's love," I thought I'd address the whole "jealous" thing because it's getting thrown around a lot here in Blabber comments. Just beca