...Big Pussy!

Vincent Pastore will no longer be putting on a little red bolero jacket and dancing the mambo, according to a press release from ABC. The actor said the physical demands of the 10-week competition are just too much for him. "When I initially committed to joining Dancing with the Stars, I didn't realize just how physically demanding it would be for me. Unable to put forth my best effort, I felt it appropriate to step aside and give someone else the opportunity."

No word on who his replacement will be.

Old Vinny only got through one week of rehearsals.
The joke here is so obvious, and I'm much too much of a lady to make it.
Wink, wink.

As mentioned, Tracy and I will be debating some of the hot gossip that we disagreed on this month. For example -- the fact that Tracy thinks Gisele is skanky and how I think Will Smith is too much of a goodie-goodie. Today's topic? Britney. Let's just dive in...

Suzy: Now for Britney... I wish you'd be harder on the girl. I know she's in the midst of a very public meltdown, but don't you think she brought these problems upon herself? Who told her to marry scummy boyz? Have two kids and have someone else raise them? She had it all -- fame, fortune a cute boyfriend, hair -- and threw it all away. I like the girl -- I do. But I just don't feel bad for the predicament she's in. Famous or not, in life you have to surround yourself with exceptional people. People who know you inside and out and genuinely want the best for you and will watch your back. You've had the same posse since high school/college, so I'm sure you can see my point. How did things get so far outta control? She needs to fire her employees, family members and friends.

Tracy: Oh, Britney! To be honest, I just feel like how much more can anyone say about her? And I guess I'm a softie when I see someone get so slammed by everybody in the world. Don't get me wrong, I fully enjoy participating in ragging on stupid antics of celebrities, but sometimes I can't help but reach a saturation point. She's a wacko with tons of problems right now, no doubt, but that sentimental (or wimpy, you choose) part of me wants her to get it together and make a huge comeback. Psssst! I even want her to get back with J.T. Shhh...

Suzy: Beats the hell outta K-Fed! But let's just let her get her hair back first.

Grey's Anatomy star Katherine Heigl may not be playing our beloved Izzie much longer, according to People.com. Heigl has dropped out of contract negotiations with the ABC drama and sources say she is not happy with treatment she is getting.

"Katie is disappointed and hurt that (producer) Touchstone doesn't value her as much as her other costars, especially Sandra Oh and Isaiah Washington," the source says. ABC had no comment.

Izzie should hit the movies -- she's so the next Charlize Theron.

First Naomi Campbell takes on TV, now Victoria Beckham will be hitting the small screen.

E! is reporting that Posh will be appearing in a "real-life documentary" for NBC. Previous reports have said that Vicki's hubby, David, and their kids would be a part of the show, but a rep is now saying it will just be about Spicy herself.

Now remember, this is NOT a reality show, it is a documentary.
There's a difference.
Really.

"My daughter is going through a phase of wearing jeans so tight she can't bend her knees in them. I have a go at her and say, 'Can't you wear something else? You have a closet full of clothes and you wear the same pants every day . . . And please wear a belt because I don't want to see your butt crack when you bend over.' "

-- Madonna, the cone bustier-wearing, cross-burning, nude-posing, stage-humping, water bottle deep-throating pop star, to British Elle, about daughter, Lourdes.

Other models in attendance were Bar Refeali (Leo DiCaprio's current flame), Veronica Varekova, Yamila Diaz-Rahi, Ana Beatriz Barros and Marisa Miller.

No illnesses have been reported, so far.

Jeez, they might as well have gone to the nearest Taco Bell.

Remember last week when we dished about Brody Jenner and his terrible friend Spencer Pratt talking trash about everybody in the latest issue of Details?

Well, it seems that Lauren Conrad, who dated Jenner for a blink of an eye, is not happy. The Hills star skipped Us Weekly's Oscar party -- which was co-hosted by her own show! The buzz at the bash was that L.C. was so pissed at what Spencer said in the men's magazine that she refused to be in his presence.

When Jenner was asked about Conrad on the red carpet, he said, with a twinkle in his eye I'm sure, "I love Lauren. It's all good." Lauren's co-star, and Pratt's girlfriend, Heidi Montag, would only say, "I wish she was here."

Lauren's got class and pride and that's a lot more than I can say about the rest of them.

And by "hit" we mean a right hook to the jaw of Gerard Rechnitzer, a real estate broker, who was attending a post-Oscar party Sunday night.

Rechnitzer returned from a trip to the little boy's room to find Diddy hitting on his woman. When the man began to usher his fiance out, the rap mogul asked the lady to come to a party he was having. When Rechnitzer persisted, Diddy allegedly socked the man in the face. The man called 911, but Diddy left before police arrived.

I think the girl is at fault here. I mean, yeah, Puffy shouldn't have hit the guy, but the lady, who was probably loving the attention, could have put a stop to the altercation a lot sooner. No? What do you think?

As mentioned yesterday, Tracy and I will be debating some Hollywood gossip issues that we didn't agree on this month. Like what? Well, like the fact that Tracy called my girl Gisele a skank. A skank! Isn't that a term reserved for Paris Hilton and her peeps? Anyway, today's topic is Will Smith. Tracy is jiggy with Big Willie. I find him too much of a goodie-goodie bore. Here, we duke it out Blabber style...

Tracy: Now, about Will Smith. How could you possibly disagree with me on his hotness? The man is a gift from God and having it all certainly agrees with him. With talent up the wazoo, adorable offspring and a wife that adores him, Big Willie Style is the total package. I certainly wouldn't kick him out of bed -- or off the couch, or the kitchen table... um, sorry, whatever. If you think differently I'd like to hear your crazy reasoning.

Suzy: You know what it is? The Pinkett-Smiths bore me. Just once I want to hear Will drop the f-bomb in one of his songs -- or take a role in which he plays a beer swiggin', adulterous jerk. Instead everything is peachy keen perfection and a cynical gossipeur like myself just doesn't buy that. Truthfully, I think there's something going on between the Smiths and Cruises. What do they have in common? It's quite suspicious. I think the Pinkett-Smiths have been sipping the Kool Aid.

Naomi Campbell is one of my favorite people to talk trash about because she is so -- how can I put this -- INSANE!
Now we can all watch as the drama unfolds together.

The supermodel is set to star in her own MTV reality show, which will depict her search for a new assistant. A source said: "Naomi is famous for her spats with staff, so the idea is to try to have some fun and capitalize on the situation. Plus, it's TV work, which Naomi hopes will lead to acting jobs."

Naomi's last six assistants have quit because of her violent temper.
SIX!
I'm setting the TIVO now.

We knew Drew Barrymore spent her birthday with BFF Cameron Diaz on the beach in Hawaii, but we just heard that Drew also had a male companion.

Hottie director Spike Jonze accompanied Drew and Cameron on their island getaway, and Ms. B and Spike shared some couple time in the ocean. He was also by her side on the trip home.

Whatever is going on is certainly working for Drew, who has been looking mighty fine as of late.

Ok, Suzy. Just breathe.

The word on the street is that former Melrose Place co-stars Heather Locklear and Jack Wagner were seen at a pre-Oscar party "hand-in-hand".

Now, if you've kept up with how Suzy and I came to be, you know that we met at a former place of employment, where we bonded over our love for Jack Wagner. Well, it was actually our love for Wagner's character on General Hospital, Frisco Jones, but we spent countless hours talking about how one day he would be ours. I think we even agreed to share. We went as far as going to see him in concert together -- but that's a whole other story.

Anyway, Locklear, who's recently broken up with David Spade, always had intense chemistry with Jack on -screen, and now it seems to have carried over. Spies say the duo "looked very much like a couple - they seemed very comfortable together. They stayed close to each other during the party and they even left hand in hand.”

Foiled again, Suze!

Michelle Williams and Heath Ledger, who met and fell in love on the set of Brokeback Mountain, have managed to fly under the radar since coupling up. The twosome, who live Brooklyn with their daughter, Matilda, kept out of trouble by blowing off the Hollywood life for a while.

Well, time might be up. Sources say Michelle and Heath had a huge falling out when Heath spent Valentine's Day with a bunch of other ladies at Teddy's in Los Angeles. Though the source says Ledger wasn't doing anything inappropriate, Michelle heard about it and freaked. She's reportedly giving him the cold shoulder.

Hopefully this is just a small bump in the road for the lovebirds. I'd really love to see them make it.

Why he can't Bobby Brown stay out of trouble? You would think he would learn from his mistakes.

According to Access Hollywood, the actor was arrested in Massacuhsettes Sunday, for the second time this year, for failing to appear at a child support hearing in October. Bob is stuck in jail until he can come up with $19,000 in back child support. Brown was picked up by police at his daughter's high school, where he was attending her cheerleading competition.

He was on a roll. Attending her cheerleading competiton was a good thing. Getting arrested there? Not so much.

Eddie grabbed his date, Tracey Edmonds, and stormed out of the theater. He didn't even bother staying to see if co-star Jennifer Hudson took home the gold, or watch the girls perform.

That Eddie. What a team player, huh?

Cute and chivalrous? That might just be the case for this young Hollywood star.

Josh Hartnett was leaving one of his regular Lower East Side taverns the other night in NYC, when he came across a man harassing a woman. According to Page Six, Josh stepped in and, without throwing any punches, advised the guy to step off. A source said that there was no physical altercation -- just a couple of raised voices as Josh gave the bully a good talking to.

Sigh. My hero.

Now that there are officially two Blabber-ers -- well, two and a half with our beloved Lindsey -- Tracy and I thought it would be fun to go head to head on some of our differing opinions. Then you guys can weigh in and tell me I'm the one who is totally right who you agree with.

Suzy: So you called Gisele a skank this month and caught some crap for it from the supermodel lovers. I have to agree with them, I really don't think Gisele is skanky. She dated Leo for like five years and Tom Brady has been her only big boyfriend since. It's not her fault Tom stuck and ducked Bridget Moyahan. I blame him. Besides, if Gisele is a skank, how do you describe Paris Hilton and the members of her posse like Kim Stewart and the new sex tape queen Kim Kardashian? Skank city, friend.

Tracy: Point taken. Those other names you dropped (Paris, Kim S. and K.K.) are from the superslut category --there's a difference. Anyway, Gisele walks around like her doo-doo doesn't smell like poo-poo, and that annoys me. Whether or not Tom is to blame in this whole baby fiasco is null and void. I'd just love to see Gisele get dumped and knocked down off her very high, supermodel horse.

Check this out. An obsessed fan handcuffed herself to Hugh Grant at the premiere of Music and Lyrics in Amsterdam.

Cielke Sijben, a journalist working for a Dutch TV station, leaped forward as Grant walked the red carpet in Amsterdam and clamped the cuff on the star's wrist. Firefighters were called in to break Grant free, and the reporter was arrested by police.

A witness said Hugh was a good sport about everything. "He was the ultimate professional. He just stood in silence and waited for the firefighters to free him. He did look relieved when he disappeared into the theatre - she could have been a maniac."

Okay, I guess if I were a star that would freak me out, too, but reading about it just made me laugh.

The girl is in rehab and the drama still can't be stopped. According to The Mirror, Britney was in need of medical attention last night at Promises.

Paramedics rushed to the facility to treat the fading starlet, with Brit's mom and Kevin arriving shortly after. Officials confirmed that Spears was examined by paramedics after a call by worried staff on Saturday night. A Malibu sheriff at the scene said, "She is going to be okay."

A another witness reported, "Police said staff were concerned about Britney - but they didn't say why."

Nobody said detox was easy.

I'm just sitting here thinking some more about the Oscar telecast and I can't help but think Beyonce was trying to outsing Jennifer Hudson in their performance of the nominated songs from Dreamgirls.

J-Hud had just come off her win for Best Supporting Actress (which B was not even nominated for), and though we've been hearing tons of talk about how there's no animosity between the divas, and they are all supportive of each other and crap of that nature, it seemed to me that there definitely was some sort of singing battle taking place on that stage.

Loved the performance -- those girls can belt out a tune like nobody's business-- but I almost thought they were going to break into a rendition of "Anything You Can Do I Can Do Better".

Because it's just not a day without some news on Britney Spears, I'll tell you this; K-Fed brought the kids to visit Brit on Saturday, People is reporting.

That's right. Britney's do-gooding-as-of-late ex brought Sean Preston, 17 months, and Jayden, 5 months to see their momma at Promises in Malibu. "The kids are his No. 1 priority and they always have been," the source says. "He's so stressed out right now. He only wants the best for Britney and the kids."

It continues to amaze me that Kevin is coming out of all of this looking like a pillar of the community. Wonders never cease.

"This is the only naked man that will ever be in my bedroom."

The buzz at some Oscar parties over the weekend was that ultimate Playboy Hugh Hefner will marry girlfriend, Holly Madison, on his reality show, The Girls Next Door, by the end of the year. "Hef thinks business all the time, and looks for a new hook, although he also does really love Holly," says a source.

Though Hef technically has three girlfriends, Holly, sexy Kendra, and dim-bulb Bridget, sources say Holly is the most devoted. She does get to sleep in Hef's bed. At night. When they're sleeping.

The wedding is being kept hush hush, but keep your eyes open for some signs when you're watching the new season of the show.

I'll just ask my husband to tell me if Holly is wearing a wedding dress, because he certainly pays no attention to what they are saying.

I wish I could give Ellen an Oscar for her awesome job as host, but I guess she technically would get an Emmy, because they were on televison...
Anyway, I've had very little sleep but here's a list of all of last night's winners:

Best Picture: The Departed
Best Director: Martin Scorsese, The Departed
Best Actor: Forest Whitaker, Last King of Scotland
Best Actress: Helen Mirren, The Queen
Best Film Editing: Thelma Schoonmaker, The Departed
Best Song: "I Need to Wake Up," An Inconvenient Truth
Best Original Screenplay: Little Miss Sunshine
Best Original Score: Babel
Best Documentary: An Inconvenient Truth
Best Documentary Short: The Blood of Yingzhou District
Best Supporting Actress: Jennifer Hudson, Dreamgirls
Best Foreign-Language Film: The Lives of Others
Best Visuals Effects: Pirates of the Caribbean 2
Best Cinematography: Pan's Labyrinth"
Best Costume Design: Marie Antoinette
Best Adapted Screenplay: The Departed
Best Animated Feature: Happy Feet
Best Supporting Actor: Alan Arkin, Little Miss Sunshine
Best Sound Mixing: Dreamgirls
Best Sound Editing: Letters from Iwo Jima
Best Live Action Short: West Bank Story
Best Animated Short: The Danish Poet
Best Makeup: Pan's Labyrinth
Best Art Direction: Pan's Labyrinth

It's 6:29 a.m., and having officially pulled an all-night, I feel like I'm back in college. While I go celebrate an amazing Oscar night with a pot of coffee and a pint of Ben & Jerry's (sssh, it's a very nutritious breakfast), check out what kept me up all night.

From Jennifer Hudson's big win to Kirsten Dunst's HORRENDOUS dress/makeup/hair/personality/everything, don't miss photos of the highlights and lowlights of the Oscars.

Go to the Best and Worst of the 2007 Academy Awards slide show now!

Tom was missing his Kat during the show, but don't worry, the separation was only temporary. They reunited at the Vanity Fair party right after the Oscars ended. Bummer. Check in on photos of other hot couples we spotted at the show in our slide show.

Go to the 2007 Hot Oscar Couples slide show now!

I love that Jack Nicholson is rocking the Britney look. And I thought he was the trendsetter.

Forest Whitaker won (as predicted). And, yes, Martin Scorsese finally won. Hip hip hooray.

To me, it's one step closer to the end of the show. I'm beat.

Here's another one for the ladies... Georgie Clooney presenting.

What the hell is going on with Philip Seymour Hoffman's hair? I know he's not all into style and fashion -- he's an artiste. But comb your friggin' hair when you're presenting at the Oscars!

Here you go, sis. Hope this makes you happy. He's totally awes.

I wish they gave out a lot of the "boring awards" during a pre-show ceremony like they do at the Grammys. (Not that it makes the Grammys any shorter!) So during things like Best Score, I have to find my own amusement. In this instance, it's looking at a photo of Emily Blunt and Michael Buble. I don't know why I like them so much, but I really do. Or maybe it's just her accent. She sounds so cool. Damn those Brits. They could be saying something like "I'm a total bimbo slut" and still sound cute and classy while doing it.

Photo courtesy of AMPAS

Dude, there should be some type of rule that people need to deliver their Oscar speeches in English... or we need an interpreter who is on it. Poor Clint Eastwood, who forgot his glasses and barely got through his own lines, is playing interpreter and it's not going so well.

In the meanwhile, I think I've found another couple in which the dude is shorter than the dame. Check out Marky Mark and his baby mama.

While Celine Dion puts us to sleep... how about a little Daniel Craig to keep us up.

This one is for my sis, who loves to say "Daniel Craig"... over and over and over.

Photo courtesy of AMPAS

Jennifer Hudson shouldn't have won supporting actress because she looks so unfortunate. But at least she lost the space age coat. That makes it look way better.

And I love how Beyonce is clenching her hands together. Fakeness.

One last thing... Does God not love me because I don't have an Oscar? I hate when celebs thank God for silly statuettes. Makes me glad to live in the real world.

And do you notice they're sorta walking funny? Straight hair causes people to walk weird? It's like they're trying so hard to keep it tucked behind their ears that they're all walking like robots.

I love Ellen and thought her opening act was great. Maybe she should stick to the stage.

Oprah looks good these days. Not skinny minnie, but healthy. That's why I'm committing myself to 30 minutes of exercise a day, five days a week -- a la Bob Green and the Best Life thing. Well, I'm committed to it this week. Who knows beyond that.

Kirsten is holding her tummy because _________________________________.

And may I say that I've been up close and person with my bathmat lately. I slept on it last weekend. Seriously. Talk about a hot mess.

Our Beauty & Style team is taking a little poll and I thought you'd like to cast your vote as well. Not sure why Jennifer Lopez is on the best dressed (she looked hideous), but that's why I'm a gossipeur and they're the fashion experts. Weigh in below.